Kyle Colod | Issue 45

Kyle Colod

Kyle Colod

Kyle Colod Interview Photos: Tadashi Words: Migdol

This Shop Talent the focus is Kyle Colod of K5 Poway. Kyle finds some kids annoying and professes his love for a coworker named Sarah.

I could never work in retail because people really annoy me.  Are there any kids that come into the shop that you would like to kill?  

Kyle Colod: Naw, kids in Poway are pretty much just chill but there are these shop rats that come in all the time and cause wreckage so we have to kick them out.  They’re just super young and super annoying so…

What do they do that’s super annoying?
Kyle Colod: 
They just, like, mess up all the shit and annoy the customers.  They’ll run around the shop and be loud.  The one thing is kids in Poway are obsessed with Bam.  There’s like, this one kid, who is totally obsessed with Bam.  I told him I knew Bam and I gave him this number to call.  The number was my friend’s number and so I had him pretend he was Bam.  The kid started hassling him for free decks.

What about the moms there, any hot moms frequent the shop?
Kyle Colod: 
Oh My God, dude. So many, not to mention every girl who works here is beautiful.

They are gonna be so excited when they read this.  Now’s your chance to tell the girls who work there what you really think of them.
Kyle Colod: 
Haha.  I’d tell Sarah.

Does she know you’re in love with her?
Kyle Colod: 
She has a boyfriend, I think. Yeah, but she’s super sick.

But her boyfriend’s not getting an interview in a magazine and telling her how much he loves her.  She’s your girlfriend now.
Kyle Colod:

Ok.  So you love Sarah.  Should Sarah know of anything about you?  Are you into feet, or something like that?
No, man, I’m not some sketchy guy like that!  Well, pretty much every girl who works here is pretty sick.  There are a couple in relationships going on with coworkers here.

Is there any store policy on coworkers hooking up?
No, no. They keep it DL.

Do they have the keys to the shop so they can go in after hours and get busy?
No, well, maybe they do because they both have keys.

Uh ohhh, so they’re two managers?
I’m pretty sure they don’t come in after work cause we have alarms and crap.

Oh, I am sure the managers know the security codes for the alarms.
Yeah dude.

Do you like your bosses?
Yeah, my manager is pretty sick: Steve.

So is Steve the dude who’s hooking up with the other shop manager?
No, no, There’s like three mangers here.

So what are their names?
Matt, Steve, and Devin.

Devin!?  So two of the managers who are hooking up are guys?  It’s a guy-guy love relationship?
NO, no no no no.

So Devin and Steve hook up?
You’re crazy.

Well you said that the two people involved in a relationship were managers and you just told me the three managers were dudes soooo…
Yeah, but I gotta get back to work soon.

You’re working for the shop right now!   You’re doing an interview.  Go tell them you’re doing an interview and you’ll back in five minutes.
Yeah, but we’re not even supposed to have Automatic out on the floor anymore.

What!? Why?
Cause of the girls, and the bad language.  It’s stupid cause K5 run ads all the time.

So, what, they got complaints?
Poway store took them out.  There are still some in the skate section though.  Yeah, people would call and stuff. I guess parents don’t like them.

Oh, Poway.    So maybe we should drop them at other shops instead?  Other shops are running out of mags in like a weekend so maybe we should give them to a shop that wants them?
I want them.  I’ll take them all.

Has any kid ever come in the store and wet his pants in the store?
No. We just tell kids to go to KFC when they ask us for a bathroom.

So what if a pregnant mom who is like 8 1/2 months pregnant is buying stuff and she’s gotta go real bad.
I guess I’d let her use the bathroom.  Yeah. It’d have to be a hot mom.

So you’re into pregnant moms * ?

Have you ever busted anyone for shoplifting?
Naw.  I haven’t really been here for too long.  I guess a long time ago employees would put stuff in trash bags and put them in the dumpster, then come back later in the night to get it.

Interesting.  Do you ever help girls get changed in the dressing rooms?
Yeah right. I wish.  Hey I gotta run and get back out on the floor.  Can I give out thanks?

Yeah go ahead but make it fast.
Max D and everyone at K5, Jake Smith, Tadashi Yamaoda, or whatever his last name is.  And SOS.

Who’s that?
Our crew.  I don’t have another name for them.

Kyle Colod

Kyle Colod Frontside Boardslide



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