Damn Am at Volcom

Damn Am at Volcom

Damn Am

Words by Rory Parker Photos By Brian Fick

Being able to tell a good lie is one of the most important skills you will ever learn in life. There’s nothing that can get you out of trouble like the ability to look another person in the face and tell them a straight out lie.  But it’s not easy.  Lying effectively necessitates a moral outlook that is at odds with what most of us are brought up to believe.  I, like every person I’ve ever known, was taught that lying is immoral, and hurtful to its recipient.  But really, morality is such an subjective thing that, once you rid yourself of that faggy little voice that whispers, “That’s wrong, oooooo, bad boy,” it comes about as easily as taking a healthy shit. Enough with my outlook on virtues of lying lets move into the Damn AM editorial. Actually give me one more paragraph to address lying.

Damn Am

Anthony Schultz kickflip over the pyramid to back lip on the rail at the Volcom Damn Am

I don’t really respect most people enough to think they deserve the truth. For the most part I just lie for the fuck of it.  When I was in high school my dad would always say that he could tell a lie as soon as it was spoken.  And I bought it.   Then I started lying, constantly.  Not even when it mattered.  Like, he’d be all, “Where are you going?”  And then I’d say something like, “Oh, I’m going to Johnny’s house to play some video games,” even though we were really going to skate the middle school down the street.  There was no reason to lie, but it would come out, he’d believe it and I’d have a smug sense of satisfaction at having pulled the wool over his eyes once again.

Damn Am

After mastering little lies, or “white lies” I moved up to the real thing.  Claiming I was going to the high school football game, but, instead going to some little sluts house to drink her dad’s beer and grab at her budding little tits.  Once you master a lie and subjugate your fear of being caught you can face down anyone with a straight gaze and an “I don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about.”  There is nothing quite like filling a person you don’t know full of bullshit.  Even better, after a lie spreads through enough people it becomes a species of truth.

Damn Am

Nyjah Houston backside salad grind

Enough with my outlook on virtues of lying lets move into the Damn AM editorial.  First off, let me say that I think that amateur skateboard contests are the best thing since sliced bread (that was sarcasism, which is the first skill of a good liar), and this years Damn Am finals were no exception (this is not a lie, it was actually a killer event). It’s good to see kids skating for the love of it alone, without any stress or pressure from parents. Because that is what skate boarding’s all about; good, clean, organized fun.

Damn Am

Two chicks battle each other with phallic symbols.

Unfortunately, with every positive comes a negative. The problem with this year’s Damn Am is that kids just aren’t getting better anymore. It’s weird, because recently it has seemed like the only difference between a pro and an am is the size of their paycheck. This year though, it only took a Big Flip Front board to snag Andrew Pott first place in the Small Rail Best Trick. Talk about phoning it in. And you can’t tell me Dominique Johnson was really trying his hardest on the big rail. Only a front salad 180 out? Whatever. And let’s talk about this Nyjah Huston kid. 3rd on the small rail, 3rd on the big, and 4th in street? He’s nine years old already, if he can’t seal the deal on a win it’s time to think about a real job. Shit, kid, you’re obviously past your prime, give up , it’s not like you will get any better.

Damn Am

Little Navarette Tailgrab

And the street finals of this year’s Damn Am, dude, they weren’t even trying. Especially Dylan Reider. The kid never misses a trick, obviously he’s just half assing it. Listen, if you can do everything first try it doesn’t mean you’re good, it just means you aren’t trying hard enough. This goes for the other finalists too, especially Sierra Fellers and Danny Rosario. Skateboarding is about competition and winning, not some hippy dippy do- it- for- fun bullshit. If you have a smile on your face while you’re shredding it means you aren’t concentrating hard enough. And don’t think that just because everyone saw you ripping means they respect you. Fuck no, in my world, if you don’t come home with a first place Damn Am trophy you don’t come home at all.

Damn Am

Ryan Cudlip, padless tailslide in the monster vert bowl right after skating in the street contest.

Hopefully Damn Am at Volcom will wise up and get this thing running right next year. Smiling kids, a great vibe, tricks that used to be unimaginable; it makes me sick. I want to see a 10 year old bawling his heart out as his mother berates him for missing a kickflip back lip, I want to see a father punch a child for snaking his son’s run. In short, it’s time to straighten up and start treating skateboarding like what it is, a sport with huge amounts of money at stake and the only chance for a future most high school drop outs will ever have.
Damn Am's Ryan Clements & Rhino

Submit your comment

Please enter your name

Your name is required

Please enter a valid email address

An email address is required

Please enter your message

Automatic Media © 2017 All Rights Reserved.

%d bloggers like this: